Your Existence is A Miracle
I have always struggled with New Year's Resolutions. I inwardly reflect on how I want to change my behavior as a new year approaches, or what I hope to do more of / less of. Usually, too many things come to mind and I’m left trying to prioritize a list of goals that I think I can “stick to” for the full year.
I’m trying something new this year by asking myself not just what I want to do, but how I want to feel.
As we’ve entered into this new year, I’ve been grappling with these words from adrienne maree brown.
“Do you already know that your existence--who and how you are--is in and of itself a contribution to the people and place around you? Not after or because you do some particular thing, but simply the miracle of your life. And that the people around you, and the place(s), have contributions as well? Do you understand that your quality of life and your survival are tied to how authentic and generous the connections are between you and the people and place you live with and in?”
Our culture encourages us to adopt a “New Year, New Me” mentality at the beginning of a new year. We set high expectations for ourselves with the “clean slate” of a new year, and if and when we don’t live up to the high expectations we set for ourselves, we feel defeated and unmotivated. I believe that this is because our existence is in an emergent state; it’s not starting once a year in January. Sometimes, we “start over” once or twice a day. But regardless of what you do (or don’t do) in those daily “clean slate" moments, your very existence is a miracle. Who you are, and how you are, is a miracle.
This year, I challenge you not to focus on a particular thing that you will do, but on noticing and celebrating the miracle of your life. Consider the contribution you are making to the people and places surrounding you, just by being who you are.
Here are my intentions as I shift my focus:
I choose to spend more time with myself. To understand who and how I am in my community and the world. To set aside distractions and spend genuine time learning and loving my own being.
Another thing that adrienne maree brown teaches in Emergent Strategy is that what you pay attention to grows. I choose to pay attention to the things and people in my life that are life-giving… and to identify and distance myself from those that are not.
In my work, I choose to lean on the experience of being in relationship with others. To recognize I don’t hold all the answers, and the answers I’m seeking often live in the hearts and minds of those who surround me.
Developing deeper connections with those I love and long for will increase my quality of life and help me let go of my urge to “know it all”.
If I divert from these intentions, that is okay. Who and how I am is continuing to emerge. The lessons and experiences that I gathered last year are all a part of me and who I am becoming. The people and places that surround me are emerging and becoming, too. All of it is miraculous, valuable, and worthy of love.
